I'd Rather Live in a Box

“I’d rather live in a box than live with this family” is what my youngest adopted daughter informed me Saturday morning. I have to say that there are many times that I feel the same way. Being the good mom that I am (or I try to be), I tried to talk with her about why she felt that way. When she wouldn’t even talk with me, I asked her questions like, where would you get food, how would get your clothes clean, how would stay cool in the summer, etc. That didn’t work, so I tried from a reverse psychology perspective – you don’t like here because you have a full size bed, you get to go to the movies, you get to go on vacation, etc. Still didn’t work, so now I wait for her to finally feel comfortable enough to share with me what is going on in her head.

While I wait, what I am supposed to do? That was the question that I posed to myself this morning as I replayed this conversation during my quiet time with the Lord. Then a scene from my favorite movie (“Fireproof”) came to mind, Kirk Cameron’s character, Kaleb, is reading his bible, praying and going about his day to day business in a God seeking manner while he waits for his wife to see this wonderful change in him (some time I’ll share how much this movies means to me) and a song is playing in the background, “While I’m Waiting” sung by John Waller. I played the song on my IPod (thank you wonderful husband for having hundreds of inspirational songs at my fingertips!) and listened carefully to the words.

I then thanked God for the opportunity that has He given me in allowing me to be a mom to my children, and I realized what I needed to do to help my youngest daughter. I need to worship God and patiently wait for Him to continue to grow me and provide me opportunities to reach each of my children. I know it won’t be easy, but God is enough and He will help me.

I’m including several key phrases from this song, hoping that it brings you some encouragement as it did me today. It is a beautiful song and I apologize for not being able to include all the words, so please look it up!

I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait

I will move ahead, bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience
I will serve You
I will worship
I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait

And I am peaceful
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait

A little update from my last blog about Timmy who was at the Cleveland Clinic. He had brain surgery last Thursday and was released from the hospital on Sunday and should be heading home to Tucson tomorrow. I continue to pray for Jim, Stacy and Timmy (as well as the rest of the family) as Timmy continues to recover. Praising God that Timmy is doing so well.

Hit the Ground Running

Sunday, Monday and Tuesday were wonderful days for me, as I was on my respite trip in Tucson, enjoying the beautiful Loews Ventana Canyon Resort. It was a relaxing time, although I didn't get much sleep as we stayed out (too) late hanging out with friends of Mark's from his current and former places of employment. Our children called us quite often, so it was hard to miss them since we talked a lot. They did have a great time with Aunt Julie.

This first picture is of a waterfall that is right behind the resort that runs through the property. The second picture is the back side of the resort.

I came back from my respite trip on Wednesday and I hit the ground running. I immediately started laundry, unpacking and checking work email. We then had a licensing site visit from our Adoption/Foster Care Licensing Agency (AASK) at 4:00 PM. We learned that our red file staffing for a three year old little boy had been postpone indefinitely. God is enough, so if this little boy is for us, then he'll join us in His timing. If he is not our little boy, we will continue to pray for him and his new family. Until we know for sure, we will be praying for his current situation.

I worked two very hectic days at work on Thursday and Friday. I am still in limbo as far as whether or not I will have a job come the end of July, but God is in control. I have actually come to think that I might not make such a bad stay at home mom as the job market is not the best right now to be looking for another job. Financially the idea scares me, but I will do my best to get out of the boat and not sink if I end up receiving my RIF notice.

Even though my life has its own little challenges, there are those of my family and friends who have much bigger challenges in their lives compared to what I'm going through. I am very blessed and I have much and I want for nothing (except for maybe more time in each day - LOL).

In my last blog I mentioned that I was going to be spending extra time interceding in prayer for my family and friends as they go through challenges. I am especially prayerful for little Timmy as the doctors in the Cleveland Clinic try to determine why he is having seizures and the best way to stop them. His mom, grandma and one sibling are with him there, while the rest of his family is at home in Tucson as his length of stay could run into multiple weeks. I can't imagine having one of my children being ill and undergoing tests and my husband not being able to be with us during this time. Through this challenge that they are going through, their eyes are still focused on God and His plan for their little boy. I pray that the doctors are able to diagnose him quickly and come up with a treatment plan and reunite this family and I ask that you join me in this prayer.

Jeremiah 29:11 is my life verse and it brings me great comfort in knowing that God has a plan for me and my family, as well as little Timmy. And God is Enough.